I am a Neutered Psychological Stud

I'm not a boy -- let's get that out of the way before people get confused by the title... and on with the sponsored message of the day; brought to you by TONS of Diet Pepsi and a whopping truckload of frustration.

This quarter of college can best be described by one word and one word only: UGGGGH.

Trying to remember what I'm doing in 10 seconds has taken a backseat to providing edible meals for my offspring and fielding attitude-inflected comments from the elder one. So has paying rent (and of course electricity -- who needs lights going out in the middle of a study-session already on the brink of ending as soon as it begins?) I have even overlooked calling my landlord to inform him that the cooler has gone on strike, a second blow to having my neighbors constantly slowing down to see what I'm doing in the kitchen because he's neglected to provide window coverings for that window after the umpteenth request (okay, maybe only three, but c'mon! Gimme a break! I finally took dark curtains and made a stand-in that will work for now, even if I can't see my hand in front of my face during broad daylight hours.)

So, I guess what I'm saying is that I'm Brain Dead -- officially. After much internal debate over what I must be missing in my diet or lifestyle by clearing my head of the obsession that the answer was on the internet, I came up with three posts from different blogs and websites that indicate that I'm either already checking off the mental checklist of remedies as we speak, or some version thereof. Here goes the list, given by Google and read with rolling eyes and a sneer by me:

Diet Changes/Focus: "Brain Food Helps students Power through College Finals" http://www.askstudent.com/health/brain-food-to-help-students-power-through-college-finals/

Stress Reduction: "Finals stressing you out? Try meditation"
http://www.collegenews.com/index.php?/article/using_meditation_to_rid_yourself_of_anxiety_05062009942136/

Things I misled you all and I actually have NOT done in any way, shape, or form (i.e. sleeping enough, not worrying, etc.): "Tips for Taking College Finals"
http://hubpages.com/hub/Tips_for_Taking_College_Finals

Okay, so I lied about doing all three and actually stretched the truth a bit on the second -- who has time to meditate when you have children and 14 units? But I did try deep breathing (just to clear my conscience). It's not that I expect anyone to read this, but if you are, I'd appreciate some feedback...

Parenthesis Overload

quotient (def)- "the ratio of two quantities to be divided"
a.) proportion - the quotient obtained when the magnitude of a part is divided by the magnitude of the whole


As much as it gives me an ego-trip (wait, where'd she go???.....) to know I scored 132 on an online IQ site (and trust me, I could use the ego-boost sometimes!), I wonder if the whole premise of the thing (not doing in-depth research, and all) is that the test compares one person's intelligence to another's (this is measured by questions such as: "If you were given the letters 'G-F-N-E-A-L' and asked to rearrange them, would you come up with the name of an
: A) cat B) building C) city D) store ). Of course, for copyright purposes, I modified the question, but you get my drift.

I wonder (and I REALLY wonder -- so much, in fact, I went and looked up "Mensa" at the local library and picked up a book on their kind of brain teasers since I received an on-the-cusp of a Mensa-qualifying score on the particular test I took) how qualified this type of testing really is for measuring intelligence because it certainly doesn't measure common sense (in my opinion, common sense is choosing to do the appropriate thing for the situation at hand regardless of the level of pre-existing intelligence) and I have proven this. Who came up with this test, anyways? If you know, I'd be more than happy to let you do the research because I'm too busy avoiding my it-took-me-all-quarter-long-to-write-this-research-paper paper that's due in three days to do it myself. Go figure (refer to previous posts to see this pattern of avoidance in full effect! Go on, I dare ya'!)

But, for now, I shall continue my love affair with (parenthesis) and continue on my merry, having a 132-IQ-that's-readily-accepted-by-most-Americans-as-making-me-smart, score and smile all the way to my flash drive which holds the file necessary to determine this student's decision on "Will She or Won't She: The Student's Avoidance Procedure of Research Papers".

And it costs money, too...

So, here I am in a veritable crockpot of classroom sewage in my mind. I've got a dumpster full of information in the 3rd week of school and it's all sloshing around in that good ol' apparatus I call my head.

Now, to sort it out. Too bad they don't make a computer program with a little computer man that crawls in your ear, cleans out the "useless information" (i.e. knows whether or not you'll ever need it again), and simultaneously organizes the rest of the information in your head into neat, little, cross-referenced categories.

Like say, for instance, I wanted to know how Article III of the Constitution applies to the Judicial Branch of the U.S. government (which, we're pretending I actually WANT to know this-- I'm only using that as an example because I have an exam on it next week and just got out of that class so it's firmly embedded in my brain) and cross-reference that information with everything my instructor has ever hinted is going to be on the exam. Voila! I would only study that particular information and would scoot it neatly into its own mental folder labeled "Poli Sci, Exam I" for easy access when I take the exam! Instant A!

Of course, they're just now getting to the point where they're microchipping people's passports and dogs, so this may take a while. But for all you computer nerds out there, get on it!!! I'm drowning in information here! Thanks...

By the by, I dropped the USCP course and am taking another GE course for credit/no-credit instead. Yay!

Where am I, a rubber room?

Although I should be sanctioned to the aforementioned cube, the reason I wrote the headline is to get people's attention for the following:

COMMENT ON MY BLOG, PEOPLE!

This blog wasn't simply created for my amusement -- rather, it's a tool to remind me that I actually DO exist outside the student sector of the planet. THEREFORE, it is mandatory I receive contact with the outside world for this to take place. So, in that light, comment or email me at will. Thanks!

Just checking in...

My adoring fan (singular, ha ha) reminded me that I have a blog yesterday, so I feel compelled to write.

Must I write? I just completed three assignments for two other classes including an essay for my Poetry Writing Class on "Why I hated the poet I just went to watch on Sunday" (I didn't really name it that, but it sounded more interesting than "Poetry Reading Report"). It was supposed to be 500 words, by the way. And just to add extra emphasis to the fact that I have terminal verbal diarrhea, it turned out to be closer to 950 words. OOPS.

Anyways, chronic over-achiever that I am, I had a meltdown yesterday. Seems that when I was attending community college, I got into a habit, albeit a routine, of taking naps whenever and wherever necessary (even in my car in the parking lot of the local library). Since I decided to be a full-fledged Poly Dolly, I've suddenly decided that I should try to function sans nap. NOT A GOOD IDEA. So, I dropped everything, and I mean everything to nap yesterday. Day went much much better, thank you very much.

I am hoping this, however: to all students, previous, present and future -- I welcome any suggestions, however small, as to how to balance this bucket of chaos I call my life and all the accompaniments thereof. This includes children, school, doctor's appointments, grocery shopping, housecleaning, cooking, etc. etc. ETC. HELP!