Who invented caffeine, anyway???

Oh yeah, since I'm a "smart one," I forgot caffeine is a naturally occurring substance. You wouldn't be able to to tell, though, with the way manufacturers keep sucking the stuff out of biology and shoving it in cough-syrup-tasting drinks. And Starbucks are like legal drug dealers--okay, so --I'm a little tense. Just because I took another midterm today (seems my midterm from yesterday was lonely) and so I just had to jack myself up on caffeine before the exam. Wow.

Did you know that we human beings have actual receptor sites for nicotine (these are to our brains like loading docks are to the shore)??? SO glad I don't smoke. Anymore. But I gotta tell you, this courseload I've got makes me want to pick up the habit again. Not gonna. No way. I have saved my lungs (not to mention the environment and OTHER people's lungs) for way too long to go back to that.

...BUT, looks like I'm gonna have to give up caffeine. It's wreaking havoc on my nerves. I just don't see how that's gonna happen though. My biopsych professor from last quarter is my hero-- she still drinks at least 8 cups of coffee a day (used to be up to 20). I love coffee.

Gotta go, more school related stuff I gotta do!

And it costs money, too...

So, here I am in a veritable crockpot of classroom sewage in my mind. I've got a dumpster full of information in the 3rd week of school and it's all sloshing around in that good ol' apparatus I call my head.

Now, to sort it out. Too bad they don't make a computer program with a little computer man that crawls in your ear, cleans out the "useless information" (i.e. knows whether or not you'll ever need it again), and simultaneously organizes the rest of the information in your head into neat, little, cross-referenced categories.

Like say, for instance, I wanted to know how Article III of the Constitution applies to the Judicial Branch of the U.S. government (which, we're pretending I actually WANT to know this-- I'm only using that as an example because I have an exam on it next week and just got out of that class so it's firmly embedded in my brain) and cross-reference that information with everything my instructor has ever hinted is going to be on the exam. Voila! I would only study that particular information and would scoot it neatly into its own mental folder labeled "Poli Sci, Exam I" for easy access when I take the exam! Instant A!

Of course, they're just now getting to the point where they're microchipping people's passports and dogs, so this may take a while. But for all you computer nerds out there, get on it!!! I'm drowning in information here! Thanks...

By the by, I dropped the USCP course and am taking another GE course for credit/no-credit instead. Yay!

Don't institutionalize me for being smart...

I have a brain that thinks all the time -- whether or not it has permission from me. I remember one time, not too far back in the cave of my brain I call "memory" the morning I woke up and I was already IN MID-THOUGHT. I didn't know that was possible.
Well, now I do! Howdy doody on that one, folks.

Second week of the quarter and I'm not as insane as I was last week. Beginning to see the difference between busy work and actual things worth taking my time on. I have discovered a very reading-relevant fact about myself: if I think what I am reading is important, I read REALLY slowly. I mean, REALLLLLL - l- - -llly, slowly. It's annoying. However, I shall find a way around this as well. Well, I got a full load of classes and a limited number of hours in my day.

Gotta go!

HELP, I can't b-r-e-a-t-h.e.....

First week back at school with a full load this quarter. My anxiety is through the roof so I just thought I'd write about it to take the edge off.

Been praying -- a lot -- lately. It's not so much doing the work at school and at home that gets to me. It's the in-between times when I don't have anything to do that I well up with an overflow of anxiety that, if converted to food units, could feed an entire country it seems.

I want to eat my stomach right now, then maybe it will quiet down a bit. But rather than to disembowel self, I shall disengage. Time to leave campus and see what goeth on in the "real world."

AHHHHHHHHH-I-I-I-I-I-I-I...

...can't wait for school to start so I can stop trying to eat my own stomach from anxiety. Seems I've taken test anxiety one step further straight to insanity.

I'm taking two Psychology core courses and a GE class that fulfills a "USCP" requirement (which is a fancy way of saying: "Hi. We've packed so much dry course material into this class you will either die from boredom or be comatose by the end of the quarter. Have a nice day - oh yah, and by the way, that'll be five hundred-and-some-odd dollars please. Thanks.")

Okay, so I'm being a bit cynical. OKAY, so A LOT cynical. But I'm just trying to get it out of my system before school starts so I can be drained of all negative energy and have nothing left but to knuckle down and do the dirty work. Oh yeah, and go to class...

BY THE WAY, HAPPY NEW YEAR, Y'ALL!!!!!!!